The Unknown

This is one of five drafts I have started writing, got distracted or tired of writing, left and can't seem to get back to.  When something's rolling around in my head, I need to sit and write about it in one or two sittings otherwise I move on to the next thing and no longer care enough about the old idea to work to get it into words.  It's hard for me to look back on  the things I've written objectively; I seem naive, dramatic, and wordy to myself now!  But if I didn't write, I'd have no trail to look back on and see where God has brought me.  I'm changing and growing and it's not always pleasant to realize how immature I was when I thought I was getting it right for once.  If I don't write in the present, honestly capturing my thoughts and experiences, I lose track of where I am.  So all those unfinished drafts unfortunately are going to remain unfinished because there's no way for me to backtrack to where I was weeks or months ago when I began them.  This is where I am today...


We fear what we don't understand.  That's not a new concept, but I'm realizing we also intentionally close our eyes to the truth and choose one fear over another.  


I was reading Revelations-the book in the Bible that a guy name John wrote about what God revealed (hence the name) about the end of the world, and for the first time when I read the beginning I saw it from the viewpoint of someone who doesn't buy into the whole 'all scripture is inspired by God' deal.  That is a trippy book even for people who believe it's from God, but without that authority behind the account, it just sounds ridiculous!  I kind of laughed to myself, thinking how strange this must sound, "I was in the Spirit on the Lord's day, and I heard behind me a loud voice like the sound of a trumpet...then I turned to see the voice that was speaking to me."   

I suddenly remembered how according to Islam, Mohammed received revelations from Allah and recited them to others...I was shocked and disturbed that my mind had connected the similarities between the two men.  I've always read the account of Mohammed's encounters with Allah with a very skeptical, cynical mind-"oh right, he sits in a cave and starts shaking and hearing voices and everyone assumes he's heard from the Creator!"  Why do I assume that of John of the Bible though?  No one freak out, I do believe that John heard from God and for many reasons I do not believe that Mohammed received his revelations from God.  For one, if Mohammed was hearing from God, he would have mentioned that he'd recently sent his only son, the Messiah, to die for everyone and reconcile mankind to himself.  And he would have told him that it is by grace through faith that we can be saved, not by our works.  

Anyway, my point is that I read the Bible with blindness that someone who wasn't assuming so much about it wouldn't have.  I want to see the Bible truly, as God wrote it for humanity to know him, not as scholars and theologians want me to see it.  I want to know the one true God, not this idea I've made that I'm comfortable with because everything about it fits nicely in my boxes.  Wait, back to my original point-I was so uncomfortable when I realized Islam and Christianity have a similarity I wasn't aware of, because it meant my cold cynicism and judgmental attitude were hypocritical.  If I have faith to believe that John saw heaven and the events of the end of the world, why do I scoff at Muslims who say a man heard a voice tell him all kinds of crazy and amazing things and called himself Allah?  It's so much easier to pretend their faith is ridiculous and ours makes perfect logical sense.  In that respect, Islam and Christianity are the same.  We both believe in some pretty strange things because we believe the person with the message was trustworthy and heard from God or Allah.  It's ok that we have similarities and it's probably a good thing it makes me uncomfortable.

I fear what I don't understand, but I am also afraid that once I understand I will discover I'm just like what I fear.  We choose sometimes to remain in the dark so that we don't have to face the things about ourselves we don't understand.  There are parts of our own faith we gloss over and refuse to think about deeply for fear there's no depth to support our belief, like a thin varnish covering cheap scrap metal.  Be encouraged-the Bible is true, God is holy and good, and our faith is the evidence of what is unseen.  Some things we don't understand are the surface of deep truth where priceless gold is buried.  Other things are beautiful until we have the courage to dig deeper and find emptiness.  The gold we keep, the emptiness we leave behind.

In this case, the golden truth is that God speaks to men and reveals himself to us.  The emptiness is my hypocritical attitude towards Muslims that made me judgmental and cynical instead of compassionate and sober minded.   God give me courage to think on difficult things like this, even if it means discovering emptiness where I thought I had gold.